Chances
are, if you know someone with a mental disorder or disability, you might have asked them
or thought, “Why are you tired?”
For
me, “I’m tired” is not a complaint or pessimistic. It’s merely a fact oflife.
Allow
me to explain why a person who is constantly battling their own brain and
societal expectations may feel so drained.
These
are people whose brains are stuck in overdrive and have a great amount of
difficulty unwinding to fall asleep at night. For the “average” person, it takes seven minutes tofall asleep.
Imagine
crawling into bed exhausted and it takes the average of an hour to fall asleep,
instead of seven minutes. Every nap and bathroom break and the brain relaxation
delay begins again.
These
are people whose sleep is frequently disturbed and who spend their nights
tossing and turning instead of resting. Sometimes they’re awoken by noises,
pain, an inabilityto keep body parts still, by loud noises inside of their heads, vivid dreams and
many other reasons.
These
are people who wake up feeling, at best, slightly more rested than they were
when they crawled into bed in the first place — like a battery that has been
damaged that never seems to recharge properly.
These
are people who for decades don’t feel rested after their slumber.
These
are people who put an immense amount of effort into focusing on the task
they’re supposed to do or perform, while their minds are trying to carry them
down other paths or while they are struggling to remember just what those tasks
are.
These
are are people with working memory issues who — from school age on into
adulthood — lack the skill to remember multi-step instructions in a world where
they’re just expected to know how to do it.
These
are people who are in a constant war with their own brain, people who are
battling their own thoughts and fears; hearing every day from their brains they
aren’t good enough, strong enough, skinny enough, that people don’t like them
or that they should have done better… just to list a few things.
These
are people who are in a constant war with other people’s judgment and lack of
understanding. Who are often asked questions or who hear comments like, “Why
are you always tired?” “Just suck it up and deal with it,” “It’s just a lack of
discipline,” “It’s all in your head,” “Stop being so pessimistic” and “Stop
being so lazy.”
These
are people who experience sensory overload that mentally exhausts them. From
the clothing they are expected to wear, the food they are expected to eat, the
noise around them, the sights engulfing them and the odors surrounding them,
these people’s senses are constantly under attack.
These
are people who are exhausted from self-advocating to people who don’t
understand and don’t care to understand.
These
are people who spend most of every day dealing with fears that others sometimes
find silly and irrational. It’s like living on a rope bridge swaying in the
wind over a canyon while you’re afraid of heights, and hearing, “I don’t
understand what you’re complaining about, the bridge is secure. Suck it up and
deal with it. I can do it, so you can too.”
These
are people who are struggling to communicate their experiences because
communication is a skill that needs to be taught and exercised. It’s like those
who don’t have a strong artistic talent being instructed to create a sculpture
using the items around you to present how they currently feel within the next
five minutes.
These
are people who expel a large amount of energy trying to understand body
language and emotions. It would be like showing you a picture of my cat and
expecting you to identify what he’s feeling based on his facial expression and
pose within minutes, multiple times a day.
These
are people who are tired from the side-effects of medication, or
self-medicating to cope with the symptoms of their diagnosis and the
expectations of society.
These
are people who are struggling with their brains to differentiate what’s real
and what’s not, because their brains present everything to them as reality.
These
are people who might be struggling with relationships, drug abuse and
alcoholism.
These
are people who have physical manifestations from their mental struggles because
being on high alert takes a physical toll on a person.
These
are people whose muscles ache constantly or whose muscles are tired from being
tense too often, who get frequent headaches or migraines, whose appetite is
affected and whose immune system becomes impaired… just to name a few things.
So
please, dear readers, the next time someone with an invisible disability says
that they’re tired, please don’t treat them as if they’re lazy or irrational.
Instead, imagine living your life on a rope bridge over a canyon, or imagine
how you would feel if someone jabbed you and woke you up several times a night
for just one year, and the physical and mental impact it would have on you.
I
beg of you, on behalf of all of us fighting our own silent battles, please be
patient and empathetic. Just because you don’t experience it doesn’t mean that
it’s not a reality for someone else.
Source : themighty.com