We all know that person, the one that brightens up a room – by leaving it.
They are inconsiderate of everyone around them, overly judgmental and a master
of manipulation. They are hard to deal with, and can cause unnecessary stress
in our hectic day to day lives.
While you can’t always avoid them, recognizing a toxic person will help you
to prepare yourself and manage the situation accordingly.
Here are 10 traits to watch for that will help you to spot a
toxic person:
§
Drama, Drama, Drama
They couldn’t be any more negative. There is always some crisis or problem
in their lives, something is always going wrong. If you do try to help by
offering your advice they shoot it down, informing you that it won’t work
before even considering trying it.
§
They have a lot to say, but can’t
be bothered to listen
Toxic people are often wildly narcissistic, focusing all their time and
effort on the person they consider to the most important in the room –
themselves.
§
They try to control everyone in
their lives
They are determined to get what they want, and act like everyone else is
nothing more than a pawn in their game. They want you to act in a specific way
in order to fit into their script.
§
Their personal experiences
dictate how everyone else should live
Everyone around them should judge their experiences in life based on what
they have done, not done, liked or disliked. If they eat somewhere and didn’t
like their meal it is a horrible restaurant that couldn’t possibly be enjoyed
by anyone else.
§
They unapologetically monopolize
your time
They have no concept of your schedule or life, sucking up your time without
giving anything back in return. They value their own time, but not that of
anyone else in their lives.
§
They disguise their lack of
common courtesy as ‘honesty’
Sure, they will admit that they made that harsh comment about you last
week, but it OBVIOUSLY wasn’t meant to be an attack, they were just being honest!
They lack tact and common courtesy, throwing around harsh words and judgments
without holding back.
§
They are queens and kings of
gossip
They love to talk about other people, its like a hobby. They lift
themselves up, building up their own ego and self-esteem by tearing everyone
else down.
§ They are always right
It doesn’t matter if they are trying to argue that the sky is hot pink,
they are never wrong! They are, after all, the source of all knowledge. They
refuse to learn from anyone else and if you do go against them they are quick
to lash out.
§
Their relationships are for show
They force relationships to happen in each area of their lives, not so that
they can genuinely connect with these people, but simply to show other people
how popular they are.
§
The lies just keep coming
The tell so many lies that you can’t always tell where the truth ends and
the lies begin. They make telling lies look as easy as spelling your own name.
In response to a conversation on Reddit about toxic people, and the way to
handle interacting with them, one user provided the following words of wisdom:
“The deeper your present moment peace gets, the easier it’ll
be to react non-passionately when confronted with hostility. As this gets
better, you can begin to realize more deeply just how much someone has to be
suffering internally in order to have such harsh reactions. With enough
insight, you can develop your empathy and compassion based off this knowledge
and these also help you remain even more peaceful in the present moment.
Eventually, with
enough compassion and insight on your side, you can begin to extinguish the
fires of hostility by extinguishing anger with patience and understanding… It’s
hard to continue treating someone harshly when they continue treating you well.
In helping them relieve these feelings, you not only help them but you also help
yourself, since you no longer have to deal with them as they were.”